The Unthinkable has Happened!

Yesterday I flew to Durban to be with my dad who turned 80. This in itself was feat of quite some extraordinary magic as only the Lord can produce. Through a most amazing circumstance I have reestablished contact with an old lover from times gone by, and some healing occurred. During a councelling session with my shrink processing this led to some memories about my dad coming up. In processing these, I came to the unthinkable insight that my father may not always thoughtlessly have been out to hurt and belittle me. Perhaps some of what he did he did with the genuine desire to spend time with me and do good to me. (Sure he did some stupid things, but even those he only did because he was wired that way: I know how often I have hurt my own kids in the same way!)

So the upshot of it was that yesterday I spent the day with him alone. We talked and drank some wine and had a meal and so on, and besides the fact that I think much healing occurred in me which I will only see realised in the years to come, I know he enjoyed it and it valued him in ways I never imagined.

Only a week ago this would have seemed impossible. Through a confluence of circumstance to strange to describe, the Lord has reconnected me with an ex (who remains such!) and through the contributions of my brother and sister, we had a great day with minimal inconvenience on a practical level.

I think that now we will be relating as adults more than as blamed adult and hurt child. Who knows where the future will lead?!